Ayyyyy, ‘sup everybody. I’m the narrator of this here story, alright? The name’s Lee. First of all, don’t judge, my handwriting is shit. Second, this is a little tale about my best friend and the biggest dopeass punk on the whole damn planet, Haro. Man, he’s done some crazy shit for me. Been through some pretty wicked stuff, what with his kidnapped mom and coo-coo for coco-puffs dad and all that. And still through all the horrors and demons and sins, that kid just won’t ever stop smiling. Fuck that guy and his smiles, god dammit, they kill me, he’s so damn cute. No homo.
Anyway, so I’m writing this uh, this shitty story down cause it’s kinda crazy and if I don’t do it, nobody’s gonna. And sometimes I think stories should just be put on paper, you know? Or like… at least scribbled down on some kind of 99¢ composition notebooks from the clearance bin at your local grocery store. Hey, don’t judge. I’m in college now, you know how that shit goes.